I am no activist, but I am human enough

In a world that is contantly reminded of violence and war, we are forced to remember yet again. Benazir Bhutto has just been killed by an assassin's bullet. We live in turbulent times and for one who has seen such tenacity and tragedy with such bravado, as she has in her lifetime, I salute her. Nay, I bow from the waist down to her memory and the hope of a better future. Sincere condolences to her family, especially her children.

We're going to be waking up to a lot of uncertainty tomorrow. But I believe hope should and must prevail.

Ladies and gentlemen, Benazir Bhutto!

4 words, A Book-Film, Not Anna and the King

Hey there! Thank you for a great evening - to everyone. It was lovely in its simplicty and its excellent company. Here are some of you, trying to be Carrot Top with a very big... carrot.

















Again, thank you. Have a very merry christmas, everybody! And a big merry christmas to you Trish!

And about 2008? Let's hope it's a good one, as Lennon would say.

St George and the Dragon, revised.

Here we are at this year's anime/manga exhibition. Fairuz and I took the train there and I rather enjoyed myself, truly did!

And this is me playing the defeated dragon to Maz's fearless St. George. Mercy, Maz, Mercy!

Fostering and Hopping over the Lambs who may or may not be Silent

For the first time in my life, I watched Silence of the Lambs with my ever patient friend Trish. She knows as much as I do that the reason behind me watching the film was not concentrated on the thrilling storyline. Yes, it was for Antony Hopkins. He is such a talented actor and his general demeanour was parfait for the mad Dr. Lecter. Otherwise, I enjoyed his portrayal of the repressed butler in Remains of the Day. Anyway, back to Silence of the Lambs, I thought the poodle amazing and Ted Levine a brilliant actor. No one could portray the Drag Queen trapped inside a Hilly Billy role as best as him. Scott Glenn reminded me of a surgeon but still managed to capture the role of FBI Agent with extreme accuracy. Oh yeah and Ms. Foster was pretty good too.

The Darkest One & The Saviour

There is one that shall not be named. And I think it amazing that you have been able to stand jufi (revised). Not to worry as jufi does not compare to your self-praises and declarations of being a better writer than Tolstoy, and a better composer than Tchaikovsky.

Mais alors tu ne peux parler francais et ca est malheurese. En plus, "quelqu'un" le parles tres bien et quand je l'ecoute, c'est comme je suis sur une arc en ciel.

So, not to worry as jufi is not on my skype list and you are!

A Rose is A Rose is A Rose is a What? I've forgotten forgotten.

Dear Ms Stein and Ms Toklas,

Hello, I'm from the 21st Century and don't let this advanced time fool you. I actually think we are no different from the age of conquest, medieval torture and such like. I'm a student of History you see. Anyway, I quite like your book. It makes me laugh and have faith in things we tend to take for granted sometimes. You know things such as humanity. So thanks for writing it. Thanks to both of you because I guess like a pen and its cover, one can't come without the other. Unless you're a click-y pen but I doubt it.

Sincerely yours,

rowena

The ex-Commissar and the ex-Countess Dazzle Dazzle

The good old days when films of romance, adventure, idealism and perfect hair could get away with it.

'Knight Without Armour'. Ah they certainly don't make them like they used to!

"no comment"

Hey fairuz! This got me laughing quite a bit...

"you were very tender... at the laundromat"

Easlily. One of the most amusing lines in any film I've ever seen.


But that reminds me of one of the most amusing days I've had. Not to mention the most fun. I went upside down and got my brains to my chest and screamed so hard my jaws hurt. It was wonderful. Thank you Julia and Fairuz for a lovely day. Pictures because pictures give our memories something to smile about.

Count to Ten, Make a Wish, Blow the Candles, Cut the Cake, Kiss the Air and Have a Very Merry Birthday

Dearest Trishelea,


You have now been mentioned 3 times here. However that is a gross understatement of the countless times you have been a true friend to me. And with my hand to my heart, let me wish you (for the 5th time) happy birthday. You are now 20 years old and with many years spread out ahead of you. I know that you will always make wise decisions and make your life continuously meaningful. However, when you have become undisputed master of the universe, remember me, pick up the phone and give me a call so we can have coffee (and even chicken liver with mandarin orange peels) and we'll talk of the world's problems, past wonders, religion, whether jodie foster is gay or not, and why we're still friends after so long (which honestly has a simple answer). Looking forward to it. And here's to to the past and to the future years. Salut!

Thank you again for simply being a part of my life. You have certainly enriched me in a way that only very few have. And for that, I am forever grateful. Now go have a great time!

Reference and footnotes of glory

I've been working at a near fever pace to finish as many essays as possible. Successful? Not terribly. Oh well. The dilemma of a historian.

I'm thinking seriously of becoming a professional historian/archaeologist (have I even spelt that correctly?). I remember talking to Soon Tzu about it. Me. Blue cotton short, linen shorts, red handkerchief tied around my neck, blue shades, in some desert (or dare I say underwater in the Alexandria Bay?). Live in some apartment in a square in Marakkesh. Very tempting...

Hey someone's birthday's coming up! I wonnndeerrrr who eh Trish? (this brings your name count to a glittering 2)

Time is in the oven, baking,

Has it already been almost 3 weeks at SOAS?

I like it here. I can't wait to be here with everyone. :)

Warmest greetings to you all.

Watch this site Trish!

And be stunned with its magnificence.

"Let Rome and Tiber melt for this is my space"

Dear friends,

You must forgive me for this most overdue post. I have been busy settling down and have had no proper internet access. But here I am, my dears.

It's history fever now.

How are you?

Paddle Boats and Wellington Boots

I had a grand old day with Maz and Julia at Petrosains. Helicopter rides, brain wave duels, singing T-Rex, Maz Maz the aliens are attacking abandon ship, and all those delightful memories that make good daydreams.




Me up up up in Space









Maz and Jules on an Oil rig

Time travel a little for me, if you'd please...

31 August 2007






Happy Merdeka, Malaysia.

It's now 10.55 pm, the start of a new month. It's been raining all today, and if it wasn't raining, it was drizzling. Still, nice weather for writing, listening to music, falling in love, walking, painting, sketching, reading, falling down and getting up again.

Oh yes! Saw 'System of Cikgu Tuko' twice. Really enjoyed it! Well done, Farah.

Shout out: Good luck to Julia and Mazuina and Haddy for their upcoming exams!

Listening to 'The Mikado' and wearing mismatched socks.

The Spiritual Leader of The Nation would be surprisingly good for you

A short tribute to Eva Peron I thought would be appropriate to mark her contribution to a nation, as well as to women around the world. Here you had a woman, who dedicated herself to a cause (fascist leanings it had however) and quite literally, worked herself to death for it. Rallying behind her husband, Juan Peron ('the nerve of the Argentine People'), she campaigned wholeheartedly for women's political rights, for her descamisados ('the shirtless ones'), for the impoverished (through her foundacion) during her unfortunately short life time. One may not agree with her politically (fascism, her bid to be vice president), but you cannot deny the hope and joy she brought to the downtrodden Argentine People.
She was so rooted in Peronist soil, that the movement died with her.

Requiem et pace, Evita.

So I was thinking...

I just want to Because I feel likeAnd I always
About you.

at least you haven't got any cobwebs...ooo a spider!

Is love overrated? Do we put in too much effort into people who are emotionally blind? Am I starting to sound like whatshername from Sex and the City? What is love to begin with? Can we touch it? Can we be it? Can we be in it?

So many questions perhaps prevents a lot of us from having love lives. Or maybe it's just me. Lol.

But, seriously folks. I think there is a love out there for everybody. One that works. Finally.

Don't tempt me now

Hello! Been ever so tired. Sigh. Oh here are the lyrics of a song I heard in the background of a show I was watching today.Could this be a wayof writin without really using brain power? Could be,could be. Enjoy, nevertheless.

"Blunt" by Wild Strawberries

I don't want to be beautiful
No one ever hears her speak
I don't want to be a diplomat
With a heart attack for peace

All that I need is a fire escape
All that I need is a stone
Everything that starts out burning
Ends up overgrown

I don't want to be an astronaut
I've flown higher on my own
I don't want to be a movie star
I don't need to be alone

All that I need is a blunt excuse
All that I need is a ruse
Everything that starts off burning
Ends up feeling used

I don't want to be president
There's some things I'd like to keep
I don't want to be a nightingale
I don't need to feel that cheap

All that I need is an antidote
All that I need is a muse
Everything that starts off burning
Ends up feeling used

Will it be ok?
Queen-Lazing on a Sunday Afternoon
How are you feeling today?
My Fair Lady Cast-On the Street Where You Live
How do your friends see you?
Snow Patrol-You Could be Happy
Will you get married?
Feist-Gatekeeper
What is your best friend's theme song?
Paul McCartney-Listen to what the man said
What is the story of your life?
Robbie Williams-It's de-lovely
What was high school like?
My Fair Lady Cast-A Hymm to Him
How can you get ahead in life?
David Essex-Oh What a Circus
What is the best thing about your friends?
Cyndi Lauper-What's Going On
What is today going to be like?
Chet Baker-My Funny Valentine
What is in store for this weekend?
Snow Patrol-The Finish Line
What song describes you?
The Killers-Exitlude
How is your life going?
David Bowie-Fame
What song will they play at your funeral?
Oasis-Wonderwall
How does the world see you?
Byrds-Mr Tambourine Man
Will you have a happy life?
Blink 182-Story of a Lonely Guy
What do your friends really think of you?
All American Rejects-Time Stands Still
Do people secretly lust after you?
Phantom of the Opera Cast-Wishing You were somehow here again (Shall I come again then?)
How can I make myself happy?
Tracy Chapman-Fast Car
What should you do with your life?
The Mikado-Three Little Maids
Will you ever have children?
Sade-Please Send Me Someone to Love

Good Luck, Fairuz!

So, your exams are coming up eh? You go girl!

Autobots, transform and roll out!

The Hummingbird

Josephine, Empress and Queen

She rests above my piano, eternally dignified - a true Empress. But who was she really? The Rose of Martinique? The Hummingbird to Napoleon's Sword? Was their divorce really the end of Napoleon? It cannot be denied that, chronologically, the decline of his glorious empire began not too long after he divorced her to marry Marie-Louise. Our Josephine died of a broken heart when her former husband, Emperor was sent into exile. He died with her name on his lips. Her life was unique and her person a fascinating figure in Modern History.

Here's to you, Josephine.

Choo Choo!

Public transport, anyone?

Tuxedos and Heels

Heels because I don't know how to spell stilettos. Lol.

How have you all been? I am now back online! Yes. Civilisation, hello.

Tell me where it hurts, Garbage.

What is my day going to look like?
What will my tomorrow bring me?
If I had x-ray eyes, I could see inside
I wouldn’t have to predict the future

I wish that you would do with some talking
How else am I to know what you’re thinking?
If only people would say what it really was
What it really was
What it really was that they wanted

Tell me where it hurts
to hell with everybody else
All I care about is you and that's the truth
They don't love me; I can tell
But you do, so they can go to hell

Did they ever give you a reason
To believe in something different
If you’re looking for love, for what it's worth
I have plenty of it lying around here somewhere

If you are looking for disappointment
You can find it around any corner
In the middle of the night I hold on to you tight
So both of us can feel protected

Tell me where it hurts,
to hell with everybody else.
All I care about is you and that's the truth
they don't love me; yeah I can tell
but you do, so they can go to hell

I’ve been loved but I didn’t know how to feel it
And I’ve been adored but I don’t know if I ever believed it
I’ve been loved my whole life but I didn’t know how to take it
Until...

So tell me where it hurts
to hell with everybody else
All I care about is you and that's the truth
they don't love me, yeah I can tell
But you do, so they can go to hell
But you do, so they can go to hell

Tell me where it hurts
Tell me where it hurts
Tell me where it hurts now
Tell me where it hurts...

Piercings and Barbie

Sorry about not writing - been busy! Not to mention a lack of internet connection at home. Hope all is well with you. I'm doing okay! Thanks for all your kind thoughts and words.

More sex and less aliens!

Umfufu.

Shit I just poured coffee on my white pants. White. Not any other colour. I've got excellent table manners when I'm wearing coffee-coloured trousers/skirts. Oh but when I wear white. Ah.

What if there were no Hitler....

If Hitler had ended up as a bartender in a Bavarian bar, things would have been totally different.

Post WW1 Germany would be under short-term Chancellors. Some ineffectual, some old. The economy would have been slow and people would still be buying bread with wheelbarrows of deutschmarks. However, the general world ecoonomy would pick up and things would settle. There'll be a somewhat stable government with fairly competent leaders, in the end. Hindenburg would kick the bucket and they'll find some Berchtold-type person (preferbly ex-General with a moustache). And things will flow on as usual. They'll continue producing Porsches and Mercedes Benzes (no Volkswagens though...). Socialist governments and no Berlin Wall. No Cold War even. No Medal of Honour games. Unless some other Hitler-type guy takes the cue and it'll be Heil Klinkerhoffen instead. Because you could argue that the time was ripe for national socialism, remember Mussolini (oh and if there were no Hitler, Italy would be like Franco's Spain, if he played his cards right). There will be no WW2. Stalin was non-expansionist anyway. And no Nuremburg trials.

Hitler becomes one of the most competetive bar-owner in Germany and eventually finds his own lager company, BlondiBeer, with the help of an excellent marketing manager, Josef Goebbels. Hitler marries Eva Braun much earlier than 1945 but they have no children.

Pepper at no. 207 while thinking about menus on a table in a restaurant series.4

One of Fairuz's many Artistic Pictures

Not bad, eh?

Dali Dali Dali

Finalement, je comprends.

SurrealismmsilaerruSDaliilaDSalvadorrodavlaS

He can make sex artistic, complicated, passionate, pure madness. He can paint your pain, and mirror your sorrow. Ladies and Gentlemen, Salvador Dali.

Lovely Evening

Had a lovely evening with Farah and Helena today - two bright upcoming names in theatre so don't y'all forget them names word up.

Miss you, Fairuz. No one to bitch and eat afternoon tea with pasta with!

The room is finally finished (hope father will like it - am sure he will). Love the floor. I could dine on it, with it even. Smells of woodpolish and varnish. Delish...

Not really saying much tonight. Just one or two words. Night Night! May write later though... Hmmmm. I think the mushroom soup is getting to me. It was so thick, it looked like someone puked in my bowl. But tasty though.

Good luck Fairuz

Have lots of fun and all the best! It's only a week and then I'll take you to Delicious (more afternoon tea and pasta, of course?)

Wait until she starts quoting you Stein...

My grandmother has accepted gay people, transvestites, transsexuals. They are still people and I find it wrong when certain people find them repulsive or even, sub-human. Since when did they become so self-righteous. I rather have people who are gay and kind, than straight and mean. I cannot understand why it's so terrible anyway. Gay people are people too. They have feelings and are driven by emotions, ambition and the desire to love and be loved. Gay Liberation Now!

Nothing beats a good...

Yes indeed that's right! I have had a wonderful _______. It was really very good. Not often one gets such a good_______. It's so liberating.

You wan good time with us? Five dolla? Two dolla osso can.

Fairuz and I trying out our new outfits for those evenings out at our favourite corner. Don't we look delish.











It was a lovely evening but...

Fairuz: Teringin sangat pie beef tu.
Waiter: Sori ya tapi beef pie sudah habis.

Don't you just hate when things like that happen? Makes you wonder why you love that beef pie so much. Happens to me on a daily basis. Other than that, Jones was formidable company. Oh and who cares about the pool.... Mum was funny just now:

Mum: Oh you have a nice round head, row. When you were young, I made you sleep on your face so that your head would be nice and round and so that your fat face wouldn't be so prominent.

Thanks, mum. I think her tactic only resulted in a flatter brain. Lol. Not bad though, eh?

Springtime for Hitler: A Gay Romp With Eva and Adolph at Berchtesgaden

Who wouldn't want a musical named after them? Eh, Eva? Eh, Adi?

Happy 13th, wherever you are, whoever you are now.

I miss you.

Fernando & Gordon's Drive-time Circus

I think that inside of us, is a camp man waiting to pounce out and claw his way into the kitty-kat ways of life. Whatever that means...

On today's adventure, Fairuz and I discovered our camp sides. Fernando & Gordon (that's me, darling). And no Fernando & Gordon could come without their poolboy, Jones (but considering the condition of the pool, one wonders...) who leads a double life as the Drag-queen Fairuz.

You know I have this dress that would look so good on you. Have you done modeling before?

Looking for...

Slurp.

Everybody hurts sometimes

X Files, Revisited

Ever had that thing where you re-watch something you really loved as a kid? Besides a bizarre fascination with Erwin Rommel, I enjoyed watching the X-Files. I think I was secretly attracted to Mulder and Scully's relationship. Cool dynamics. Sexual tension and aliens. Lots of aliens.

Scully: Not everything is about you, Mulder.

Bring me to your leader

On our many adventures, Fairuz and I wandered into a shop in BV2 today. When we were suddenly surrounded by clothes that talk and dance naked under the winter solstice moon.

Satisfied customers.

Weaved dresses in brown straw (for the High Priests), faded leapord skin shirts that reach to the knees (for Sacrifices) and the Flinstones' wardrobe (for midnight meetings). Everything an ordinary cult member needs.

Shout out: Good luck for the exams Trish. You can do it, more than you think you know.

Finally, the rain has come/More Butlerism

After so many days (seems like years) of drought-like weather, it has finally rained. Besides the humidity, it is actually rather beautiful. There is much romanticism in these drops of water. Had breakfast with mum and managed to take in the cool air.

I am wearing my tartan skirt, white shirt and father's purple tie. I feel okay today.

Niles Niles Niles Niles Niles Niles Niles Niles Niles Niles Niles Niles Niles Niles Niles
(continue on until page is full, thank you.)

Butlerism

Had a nice evening. Thanks Fairuz.

I have this thing for a butler. He cooks, cleans, looks so darn sexy in an apron and suit, speaks well, is witty. Ah. I could daydream about him all day. I think I dream about him at night too. He's like a piece of art I could admire all day. Oh but he's so so so funny.

CC: What do I have to do to get some milk around here?

Niles: Hover over a bucket.

Fran: What is this, foreplay?

Oh the very charm of it all.

Weird Al

Hot Hot Piece of Crumpet ~ Where have you been all my life? ~ You sex symbol, you !

I've always thought him terribly clever and witty. Hot, yes a little. That hair. That moustache. That video of "Fat". But I never realised how hot he REALLY was until I saw "The Saga Begins". Oh be still my beating heart.

Arriving at the Finland Station

Hello people.

Welcome to my small corner of the internet, a small window into my life as it were.

In case you were wondering, the Finland Station is one of many places central to History - it's where Lenin arrived to lead the Bolshevik Revolution. It has much significance to me, as a historian and a keen observer of the past.